Yesterday was day twenty-nine. The start of Week Five.
Work went well, although as it was Monday I needed my headspace after our PMO Meeting. I just wish some of them would calm down and take it in turns to discuss topics, I would engage so much more if that were the case, but I just get to a point where they talk over me or don’t listen when I’m talking and I shut down. Guys, I’m an expat here, I cost the company a lot of money because throughout my career I have acquired the experience that you guys need. That’s why I’m here. However, since you’re all more interested in telling everyone what you think rather than listening to the opinions of others – all others, not just me – I’ll just sit here and let you speak. Clearly that’s what you want me to do, else you would have more respect for me and listen when I’m talking. I’m not fighting you for airspace, we debate as a team. Honestly… prepare for another moan up on that topic in seven days’ time won’t you…
Rest of the day went ok, we had a meeting to prepare for a big IT meeting today. Our IT Team are pretty strong. They have no direct reporting structure into our CTO (meaning they do not report into anyone in our facility here) but what they do have is direct links to a very senior and influential person in the leadership Team. I know this because they made up stories about me and escalated completely unnecessarily to him, just to demonstrate this point about association, and presumably to intimidate me. Fuck that. I’m not changing the way I am I’m afraid people, I’m still going to do the same things, in the same way, so I can deliver on what I’m being paid to do. I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to deliver, to learn, to make money, and make a name for myself. So far so good.
Monday evening, I trained and it was hard. My PT is pushing me – hard – and I love him for it. We’re going to do alright here, my only real worry is how tired I’m feeling as a result of all this exercise. Six to eight weeks he tells me, and I should have fully adapted to my new training regime. Nice. Just the four to six weeks left then. But then that’s holiday time (nearly) which is my target, so let’s bring it on.
Drinking? What’s drinking? Don’t have time for drinking. Midweek drinking is seriously long gone. We have a work event tomorrow and I’m not concerned in the slightest. I do have the Delhi BC Lounge and AI flight Friday night, but I’m not overly bothered about that either, I’ve done it twice this year already, January and late May. I do have a wedding reception Saturday night however, all my pals from old but I’ll just have to take a bit of stick for it – nothing is changing me I’m on a 90 day challenge, and I’m very nearly one third of the way through, and feeling the benefits of being AF.
Gratitude
- I’m grateful for the strength to get through last night’s session. Mental and physical strength. Some drills that on the face of it look really easy, but once you start you realise they are far from easy…
- I’m grateful also for my PT pushing me as hard as he does. He’s told me he does that because he knows he can push me that hard, that I can handle it, that I’ll respond. I take that as a compliment, but like I said, I’m glad he pushes me like he does, I’d never work this hard on my own.
- I’m grateful for the opportunity to discuss the performance and attitude of certain IT colleagues with their superiors today. They won’t like it – the truth often hurts, but I just hope they sit up and take note and don’t try to blag me off.
Meanwhile, its business as usual. Crack on with doing the job, get home and cook / train / eat / sleep / repeat until Friday.
Mat out xx
My Journey into Sobriety 